I went on a date yesterday.  I’ve known him for a couple years from band camp. It was great, we had fun and went to a movie.  He’s a dork.  Funny and sweet and pretty awesome. Plays trumpet and makes nerdy jokes.  I still am having internal debates over this whole thing. I can tell he likes me a lot, but I feel like I have no depth for attraction anymore.  I don’t know what to feel. I’m trying to figure it out, whether I feel anything at all and I just can’t tell.  Like I’m in a state of numbed emotion.  Not unattraction for him, but not attraction either? I just feel so non-feely.  Doesn’t make sense but what else does nowadays.. 

Honestly, I want to date a girl.  Maybe not even that. Just someone who isn’t insane.  Someone to talk with and laugh and hang out.  Someone that I have a definite feeling of attraction for.  Someone creative and isn’t afraid to be who they are.  That’s pretty difficult to find, especially here.  Not just my location, but my age group as well. No one has the audacity to just scream out loud who they really are, including me.  

  1. machu-chu-chu-chu said: can i like this x10 oh well i just did… LIKE x 10
  2. iloveyoucharlie said: I know how it feels to be somewhat unemotional (lol). The best way I can describe my feels is that a lot of relationship crap is ritualistic nonsense, but the real substance lies in having fun & connecting and sort of being a friend rather than a gf
  3. eternusangelus reblogged this from rollwiththeoceanwaves and added:
    think plenty of people...gone through something similar
  4. rollwiththeoceanwaves posted this